Mending your broken heart is not an easy job. I wish, I had a clear answer about how to make a broken heart, whole again. Every time you think about him, you feel an instant pain, you become nauseous. The thoughts that he is happily living his life without you, the memories, wishing to be together with him must be clearly breaking your heart, and worst of all, the images of him already moving on and being with someone else, must be clearly haunting you. I wish, I could help you escape this pain.
With time this pain will slowly fade away, or with time your nights will become less lonely and easier. I wish I could ease your pain by telling you that soon you won’t be laying on your bed, clueless for hours, your loneliness killing you. Darling, I know you must be waiting for his call everyday but all in vain. I wish I could take away your sadness, rejection and dejection. I wish I exactly knew when you will stop suffering from this feeling.
Alas! I am not an angel. I don’t know exactly when you will completely get relieved from this pain or whether you will fully recover or not. It’s not in my hands to predict, when you will be completely over him, so that, you won’t throw up while seeing his picture online, when you will again start feeling hungry or this sadness caused by the break up will finally end.
But what I can tell you is that, even though now you are feeling isolated and shattered, this phase is actually making you strong.
This heartbreak, loneliness, devastation that you are facing now, hasn’t happened to you only. The feeling of getting suffocated by your own pain, the feeling that you are going to drown and never bounce back to the surface is actually a universal experience. This experience is making you stronger, braver and tougher.
I know it’s hard for you to believe that this situation where every moment you feel like you are going to collapse due to the exhaustion, is making you stronger in some way. I know it’s impossible to be brave or feel courageous when inside you are depressed and buried with the anxiety and fear of never coming out of this heartbreak.
But what you should realize is that you are fighting your heartbreak, right now only. You are surviving your heartbreak, which may not feel impressive and heroic, like it does in fiction world, as this is real life. Mending a broken heart, surviving heartbreak and being brave is much more than just being impressive.
Darling, you are surviving this each time you are getting out of your bed to attend college, school or any other function, whereas inside you must be dead like a zombie. Surviving is, every time that you want to cry but you calmly work pretending to be alright. But you are not alone. You are not the only person having a broken heart. You are surrounded by many hundreds and thousands of people who are mending their own broken hearts.
You miss me, and I wish I could give you solid information about how to mend this. All I can do is remind you that you are very brave and you are surviving this hard phase, because living each day with this feeling and still going with it, is according to me the bravest thing one can do. So hang on sweetheart, this phase will pass away and good time will come soon.